“Hello, Stever? Tip top o' the mornin' wood, young citizen! 'Tis Yours Truly Dooley, Internet Patrolman, calling. I trust I didn’t catch you at a busy time — sitting down to a heaping platter of breakfast bangers and jelly waffles, perchance — but not to worry and/or hurry; I’ll be as brief as my police-issued BVDs®. I just called to say 'twas on this very day — October 15, 1984 — that you were sitting atop the throne! No, not the toilet, my kimono-wearing friend, but the bloody Billboard® charts! Number One with a Constable’s bullet! You hadn’t forgotten, had you, chumley? ‘Twas a number of years ago — and judging from appearances, a good number of pounds, haha — so you’d be forgiven for not marking the occasion; though in my mind, ‘tis a special day, indeed. No New Years Day, mind you. No first of spring, no song to sing. No April rain, no flowers bloom. No wedding Saturday within the month of June. No summer's high, no warm July. No harvest moon to light one tender August night. But what it is, is something true, made up of these three words that I must say to you: I just called to say, 'I love you' — there, I said it — and thank you for a lifetime of “Wonder-ous”, tuneful pleasantries. Rest assured, I'll never turn a blind eye to you, if you catch my meaning, Citizen Sightless™. I mean it from the bottom of my heart.” (Click.)Tuesday, October 13
Wondering Aloud
“Hello, Stever? Tip top o' the mornin' wood, young citizen! 'Tis Yours Truly Dooley, Internet Patrolman, calling. I trust I didn’t catch you at a busy time — sitting down to a heaping platter of breakfast bangers and jelly waffles, perchance — but not to worry and/or hurry; I’ll be as brief as my police-issued BVDs®. I just called to say 'twas on this very day — October 15, 1984 — that you were sitting atop the throne! No, not the toilet, my kimono-wearing friend, but the bloody Billboard® charts! Number One with a Constable’s bullet! You hadn’t forgotten, had you, chumley? ‘Twas a number of years ago — and judging from appearances, a good number of pounds, haha — so you’d be forgiven for not marking the occasion; though in my mind, ‘tis a special day, indeed. No New Years Day, mind you. No first of spring, no song to sing. No April rain, no flowers bloom. No wedding Saturday within the month of June. No summer's high, no warm July. No harvest moon to light one tender August night. But what it is, is something true, made up of these three words that I must say to you: I just called to say, 'I love you' — there, I said it — and thank you for a lifetime of “Wonder-ous”, tuneful pleasantries. Rest assured, I'll never turn a blind eye to you, if you catch my meaning, Citizen Sightless™. I mean it from the bottom of my heart.” (Click.)