Twat do we owe displeasure?
The Daily Mash® — a generally reliable UK news source on par with America's bloomin' Onion® — is reporting that a recent study indicates some "80 Percent Of Men Are Twats," which is bloody news to no one, least of all Yours Truly Dooley®. In my estimation, the percentage skews well higher, as an accounting of the men who cross my digital pathway reveals an endless stream of twats — arsewipes, nitwits, nobs, know-it-alls, knuckleheads, dickheads, morons, plonkers and prats. Twats, the lot of 'em. Jelly-haired twats, bearded twats, thieving twats, backstabbing twats, right-winged twats, left-limbed twats, anonymous trolling twats and twerpy anchorman twats like that moustachioed Matt Glauer buggerer (pictured) whose two-faced lechery besmirches the work of honourable, properly broad-shouldered broadcasters like Ron Burgundy. Their tell-tale twattery is no recent phenomena either, as grown men of no character have exhibited what the millennials call "douchey" behavior since Neanderthals bounced boulders off one another's noggins. The footnoted source of the aforementioned twat-istic is the "Institute For Studies," which we'll assume is a dopey "think stank" like "The Heritage Confoundation™," an association of pale-skinned mouth-breathers of which we guesstimate 100% of the male members are twats.
The Daily Mash® — a generally reliable UK news source on par with America's bloomin' Onion® — is reporting that a recent study indicates some "80 Percent Of Men Are Twats," which is bloody news to no one, least of all Yours Truly Dooley®. In my estimation, the percentage skews well higher, as an accounting of the men who cross my digital pathway reveals an endless stream of twats — arsewipes, nitwits, nobs, know-it-alls, knuckleheads, dickheads, morons, plonkers and prats. Twats, the lot of 'em. Jelly-haired twats, bearded twats, thieving twats, backstabbing twats, right-winged twats, left-limbed twats, anonymous trolling twats and twerpy anchorman twats like that moustachioed Matt Glauer buggerer (pictured) whose two-faced lechery besmirches the work of honourable, properly broad-shouldered broadcasters like Ron Burgundy. Their tell-tale twattery is no recent phenomena either, as grown men of no character have exhibited what the millennials call "douchey" behavior since Neanderthals bounced boulders off one another's noggins. The footnoted source of the aforementioned twat-istic is the "Institute For Studies," which we'll assume is a dopey "think stank" like "The Heritage Confoundation™," an association of pale-skinned mouth-breathers of which we guesstimate 100% of the male members are twats.