Things you can change: Your undershorts, your underarm deodorant, your cake soap and toilet water, the elevation and curvature of your pompadour, your facial hair styling, the knot in your necktie, the width of your suit lapels, the sheerness of your stockings, the tautness of your garter belts, the hemline of your hoop skirt, the pennies in your Weejun® loafers, the jelly on your breakfast crumpet, your morning calisthenic, your bus route to corporate, the cushion on your office chair, the radio station on your desktop transistor and, above all, your attitude and work habits. Change is hard, but change is good! Self improvement is yours, Citizen 9-to-5-ers! Today is more than the beginning of the work week. 'Tis the first day of the rest of your bloody lives. Go now!!
